Skip to main content

When It Makes No Sense

This Past week was pretty hard... Every day was a struggle,
a struggle to get up, a struggle to stay strong
 a struggle to keep smiling
Only God knows the hurt and pain I have to endure..

A Colleague asked me
how my little one was and I told him..
His reply..".It doesn't make sense"
and I paused and I thought.....truly it doesn't make sense
The Pop up animal baby book I bought weeks ago
only just arrived and as I browsed through the pages,
I couldn't help but hold back a tear..
It just doesn't make sense

And as I turned and tossed in bed late at night
I couldn't help but let out the well of tears I restrained all day..
I miss my baby..I miss her coos..I miss her so much,
This does not make sense at all...
Some days are harder than the others..
but It is on days like this that God gives more grace
It is at times like this that I pour out my heart to the lord and
Ask to see through his eyes because my vision is blurred with tears
And my short sightedness..
 I don't understand why I have to go through this road
 I don't understand how God is going to bring good out of this

 I don't know so many things..
 But I know that what I know is enough to see me through my pain
 I know that God Loves me...very much.
 I know that he is a Good God.
 I know that my pain or problem does not equal HIS plan and promises for my life
 and I trust Him to keep his promise.
Most importantly I know God is in control..and it makes sense to HIM...
For God's nonsense is wiser than human wisdom,
 and God's weakness is stronger than human strength(1 COR 1:25).

 So hard as it may be ...I am going to draw strength and assurance from this scripture..
 It makes no sense to me..but It does to God
 and in a short while I would understand why I had to go through this...
 And as I remember how far HE has brought me and all HE has done for me
 Hope wells up inside me..
 So as I wipe my tears I encourage myself again and again
 and I encourage you too....

 Child of GOD..
 Yes it doesn't make sense that Mum had to go
 after the whole family prayed,fasted,believed and praised
 Yes it doesn't make sense that you keep having
 miscarriages after miscarriages especially as you are faithful and love the lord..
 I know it doesn't make sense that the promotion or desired
Job you want and are so qualified for keeps being denied or delayed
 I know it doesn't make sense that your kids are rebellious
 even after praying and loving them in spite of all
It makes no sense that you are still unmarried,or ill or in a bad marriage
I know in your situation and Life right now..so many things don't make sense
Whatever it is that is senseless to you lay it at the master's feet
let him make sense out of the nonsense

I have decided to let go of all the questions....
Hard as it may be and trust the one who knows it all
I surrender every situation to him...
and right now I say lord,Have your way...
Make sense out of this Nonsense because you know my end from my beginning
It hurts,It is so hard... But I choose to trust
that you the only wise God are in absolute control...

So child of God...let's pray this together.
Dear lord I really don't have to understand it all
because my human mind can't even comprehend it...
Just help me trust that you are in control
In Jesus Mighty Name..Amen

Then God's peace, which goes far beyond anything we can imagine, will guard your hearts and minds in union with the Messiah Jesus.(PHIL 4:7)ISV

Comments

Anonymous said…
May His Peace remain with u n give u a calmness that none can comprehend.
8 June 2013 at 12:06
Stella Agwor said…
Amen. .God bless you.
8 June 2013 at 12:12
Josephine said…
Very true dear, many things don't make sense, but as u said we continue to trust God who can make sense out of nonsense. Thanks for d piece. Just shed a tear too. Am blessed!
8 June 2013 at 12:24
Stella Agwor said…
Thanks darln...I read this post too and struggled to hold back a tear...we can only but trust him...luv u my dear..God bless you..Thanks for Reading and sharing. .
8 June 2013 at 12:28
Ade said…
As you continue on this trajectory God will give you His peace that surpasses all understanding & in His time He will surpass all your expectations. You are truly an inspiration.
8 June 2013 at 12:57
Stella Agwor said…
Amen. .thank you so much Pst Ade for reading and Sharing...God bless you.
8 June 2013 at 13:05
Abidemi said…
For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known. (I Corinthians 13:12 NKJV). The death of Jesus Christ did not make any physical sense, but is still and will forever be the greatest spiritual victory . Our journey of faith is a mysterious one and only arriving at our destination in Christ will explain the many questions that we seek answers to. We will continue to trust Him. Sweet I am so proud of you, you have been a source of strength . May Gods grace continue to abide with us.
9 June 2013 at 20:17
Anonymous said…
Words so powerful,sooo encouraging,so uplifting,so soothing,soooooo heart warming,sooo comforting,soooo refreshing n reviving.GOD bless and inspire you much more dear,to help us stand, go thru, hope, trust N believe.Stay strong stells! luv u.


10 June 2013 at 11:44
kemi said…
Hmmmm, my dear Stella, u r truly an inspiration. May God continue to be with you. Amen
13 June 2013 at 05:16
chinwe said…
Nice piece stella, so touchy,God will continue to see u through ok. Be strong.
15 June 2013 at 17:09
Stella Agwor said…
Amen my darln. ..God bless you too for being a man of faith and great strength. ..We would continue to trust....I Love you my darln....proud of you too.God bless you.
16 June 2013 at 10:03
Stella Agwor said…
Amen. .thank you for reading and commenting..God bless you.
16 June 2013 at 10:04
Stella Agwor said…
Amen my darl. ..God bless you...luv u dear yummies. .
16 June 2013 at 10:05
Stella Agwor said…
Amen thanks alot. .He would continue to strengthen us..
16 June 2013 at 10:06
Flo'AU said…
Yes, it all doesn't make sense!!! How does God bless me with such a beautiful man/marraige and no child? didn't He say ''children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward''? Am i not worthy of this reward? how? why? when? what do i need to do?! So many questions and it all doesn't make sense but i am still here!
3 July 2013 at 15:42
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF?

Before the novelty of the new year wears off Let me take time to welcome you to 2015 and wish you a great year.. I so love a new year,it is a constant reminder of the Kind of God we serve.. who gives us another opportunity To start again,dream again,run again..regardless of what May or may not have happened in the past year.. Permit me to take a slow ride down memory lane as I look back at the highlight of my year 2014... I must look back so that I can appreciate  from whence God has brought me and where he is taking me to. I must look back lest I take for granted all he has done for me. I must look back so when the enemy comes to lie to me that God hasn't been good I can count my blessings and make My boast in the Lord. 2years ago after the loss of my daughter I found out that there was a 50/50 chance that the next child I conceived  was also going to die. I remember the consultant looking at I and my husband with a very sad face as he told ...
28 comments
Read more

THANKSGIVING..

I have never had to struggle for want of what to write but I have literally spent the past minutes just staring at my screen.... where do I start from is the issue at hand How do I compress the faithfulness of GOD to me in just a post...hmmmm.. I turn 28 today..yet it seems I have been here longer.. I marvel at the quality and the richness of my life.. The wealth of experience and all that God has invested in me... For all his many blessings,For his favour and his Presence  Lord for all these and more..I say thank you I woke up today with gratitude,with a heart full of praise...God has been Good to me.. I take a walk down memory lane and I go back 15 years  to a time when I first accepted Jesus. What I am most grateful for is this decision I made to follow hard after JESUS A lot of times I failed Him,strayed away,messed up,blew my chances But His mercy never ceased and  I kept seeking and running after him.. I have come a long way 15 years later,I still l...
23 comments
Read more

She would have been 6 today

She would have been 6 today.... I can only imagine... The feeling I felt when I held her for the 1st time... My first born child,Very surreal I couldn’t believe such a beautiful gift had been given to me. Little did I know that this gift would change my life, our lives forever. She would have been 6 today... As I look back on all that has happened this past 6years My heart is truly full of gratitude. That God chose to enrich our lives with this child That God chose to trust us with this experience I would never have thought in my wildest dreams as I shared the news of my pregnancy with my dear husband that summer of 2011, that months after her birth we would be confronted with news that our precious perfect gift from God had an incurable Genetic condition and that she was going to die. How do you process that... How do you get on your knees and trust God through that How do you still love and serve God in spite of this... How do you deal with the questions,rage,pain,h...
14 comments
Read more