I looked at my husband, this sweet, sweet man that God had
blessed me with, and the tears flowed freely; “I am tired, I am tired “I
muttered repeatedly as my sobs progressed to deep groans. When would this end,
I am so tired! It had been such a difficult season, a season that seemed
unending. The week before I had lost a wallet with some valuables and I could
barely get home and this week I had parked my car and my plate numbers were
stolen. It felt like the enemy had employed all his cohorts and the mission was
to “STEAL OUR JOY” and deflate our spirit at all cost.
It was a hard season; I was physically and mentally tired. God
had probably gone on vacation, couldn’t he see what we were going through? like
God how far, how much longer was this going to go on for and how much more could
we bear?
I was so sure that
God had not forsaken us, I was confident that there was a reason for all these,
so I held on to my conviction that God was indeed a good God but I must confess
that on days like these my faith was shaky, it felt like we had been making the
same prayer request for ages, circling the same mountain, dealing with the same
challenge; it had been 1 whole year and my husband was still with no job. It
felt like God himself had closed the door of employment on us. Recruiters that
used to chase him for roles began to avoid his calls, we thought he had
contacts in his industry, but everyone he knew kept giving one excuse or the
other. We had to live on 1 income, and it was barely enough to sustain our
family being that his income was 3 times mine.
Our faith was stretched like never before, but God kept
showing us that he was with us, even in the midst of what seemed like fire, I
look back and see how he kept the peace in our home, not one day did we have a
fight over the fact that there was not enough money at home. I imagine the kind
of issues that stem from lack of finances in a home and I know how insecure
women can be as a result of that and the conflicts that can arise but through
it all we experienced a level of joy and contentment that could only come from God,
growth and maturity.
I remembered how God had given us a prophecy that my husband
was going to be very great and wealthy. That we were going to be a blessing to
many, that was like in our 2nd year of marriage and I honestly
fantasized about what it would truly look like for us when this greatness
materialised. As the years have progressed we have seemed to be moving so far
away from that picture of greatness that I nursed in my heart, my vision
included something like lots of billions in my account, fleet of cars, an array
of hired help and probably a closet filled with the finest assortment.(very
vain, I know, don’t judge me, lol)
I am so sure, that even angels where shaking their heads,
one in disapproval and two in pity as if to say, you this child you have no
clue as to what was coming. I had no idea what the journey to greatness looked
like and that it involved mandatory suffering.
It has now dawned on me what the magnitude of being great truly
means, and that when God says you would be great, it means roll your sleeves up
for the grating that is to come. That is for greatness to come, he was first
going to take you through a process that involves pain, sweat, tears and
ultimately blood to rid you of certain mindsets, attitudes, appetites/desires, character
and a whole worth not so that when he is over you can be the very best of what
he has destined you to be.
Like for real, you hear these sermons, you read about Joseph
and all he had to go through before he got to the palace but somehow we expect
God to just skip that class when it comes to us and promote us straight to the
palace. We want the glory without a story, gain without pain. No process, no
journey, we just want to arrive.
But this grating is long, hard, painful and sometimes
degrading or shameful in the eyes of people. They look at you, shake their
heads in pity and sigh, poor man, look at him he is so unlucky, his life is so
hard. Look at her, her own is so bad, at age 38, no one has ever proposed to
her, oh; she is so unfortunate maybe God shut her womb, no child yet, it has
been 8years.
They look at your journey, your struggles, the pit stops and
detours you have undergone and conclude that just maybe God has forgotten you, they
laugh and jeer at you, you become a gossip topic disguised as a prayer request.
It can be so discouraging but hang in there, dear Child of God, don’t be
discouraged, there is greatness in you and God only knows what you would
become, He is working on and in you. He is preparing you, shaping you,
moulding you for all that he is preparing for you. Would you pass the test?
I look back now and see how much God used that season to
work on our character, I see how He matured us, how he dealt with pride and
pomposity in us by allowing my husband work as a labourer in a warehouse for
long hours. He used that pruning, grating experience to make him humble,
compassionate and even a better husband and father. He would come home excited
thankful to God for the privilege to have a job again, he had learnt the true
value of work and he worked with his whole heart. He put all his big qualifications
aside and he knew he had to feed his family, so he rolled his sleeves up and not
once did he think it was beneath him. It didn’t change his identity neither did
he define himself by what he did, he would go for meetings during the day pursuing
his dreams and he would work at night in a warehouse, I watched my husband stay
joyful and full of faith, showing up in church every Sunday and it is amazing
how God’s grace makes it look easy when we depend wholly on him during a season
of adversity. It is said that adversity reveals the true strength of a man and
for some of us, the reason why God would keep certain prayers from being
answered is because we cannot handle pressure and we need to be refined through
the crucible of adversity and trouble.
5 months after my husband worked in a warehouse after
searching for high paying jobs for 12 months, he got a job without an interview
that saw him earning in 1 day what he earned working a 12-hour shift in a week.
Just like that, after a season of what looked like an unending siege of hardship
God showed up; praise God.
There are so many lessons in our story that you can glean
from;
1.
God never leaves or forsakes you even when He is
quiet, it is intentional
2.
Not all suffering is from the devil, suffering is
good for you, endure it.
3.
Adversity reveals your true character; and God
is more interested in who you become, and He would use adversity as a tool to
refine your character, so you become more like Christ.
4.
What you are going through does not change who
God is, God is Good.
5.
While you are waiting for your big door to open,
don’t sit idle, go get a job, for there is dignity in labour and nothing is
beyond you.
6.
Every word or prophecy God has given you is
true, even if it tarries, it shall surely come to pass.
I hope our story has encouraged and uplifted you, God would
not fail you. Regardless of what it is you are going through remember who you
truly are; a king. You are born for greatness! Suffering is good, endure it.
God loves you.
1 Peter 5:10 The Passion Translation (TPT)
And then, after your brief
suffering, the God of all loving grace, who has called you to share in his
eternal glory in Christ, will personally and powerfully restore you and make
you stronger than ever. Yes, he will set you firmly in place and build you up.
2 Timothy 2:3
You therefore must endure hardship as a good soldier of
Jesus Christ.
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